The Hamster Wheel of Life

During the last six months, I have been orchestrating a shift in my business strategy and focus.  I keep asking myself – Why?  Why would I change?  Why should I change?  Why do I need more?  Why am I so obsessed with growth?  Sometimes I just do not have an answer for why.  I guess that is okay.  Do you ask yourself why regularly?  Such a simple question can trigger a profound shift in our perspective.  Why do we have to do it this way?  Why am I going to work?  Why do we teach our kids the way we teach them?

THWL

The more often we ask “Why” the better are our chances of avoiding “The Hamster Wheel of Life” (THWL).  Maybe you are not familiar with THWL.  Here is a typical day on THWL – Get up after hitting snooze multiple times, rush to get the kids ready for school and ourselves ready for work (this is not without teeth gnashing and maybe some yelling), work all day in a job...

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What is Your Plan? – Part 3

We have determined what we want our lives to represent, identified our core values, articulated a vision statement, and affirmed our mission. Let's continue on to discovering our purpose and setting goals!

Step five – What is your purpose?  It is at about this point where we all sigh and say it all runs together!  Think of the major components of the planning process this way:  your vision (imagination) is the target or the house on the hill; the mission (action) is what you do to bring the vision to reality, and the purpose (motivation) is why you do what you do!  The purpose is more of an emotional connection to mission and vision.  We are building (action) the house (vision) for a (motivation) safe place to raise and love our family.  The purpose is why we serve and often the inspiration for getting us out of bed every morning.  When we lose sight of our purpose, we tend to flounder in a fog of dissatisfaction and seek pleasure through...

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What is Your Plan? – Part 2

This week, we will step through establishing a clear vision, core values, and other vital elements for planning the Intentional Life!

Step Two – Now you will identify your core values or define the qualities of character that will inspire you to show up each day representing your highest self or the best version of you.  There are many character trait lists to be found on the internet.  As an example, here is a list of my core values: Integrity, Honesty, Responsibility, Wisdom, Humor, Confidence, Achievement, Good Health, Courage, Flexibility, Mindfulness, Perseverance, Discipline, Humility, and Stamina.  These words represent the best of how I want to show up every day.  Do I live up to these core values every moment of every day?  Nope, not even close, but I am chasing them every day.  My heart is right, and the desire to live into these core values is always present.  To be the best possible version of ourselves, we first need to...

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What is Your Plan? – Part 1

My wife and some great friends have been planning a trip to Vermont.  There is a great deal to contemplate, decide on, and execute on when planning a family trip.  My wife does most of the heavy lifting with the plans, but it still takes two.  Here is a general outline of the steps we use for planning our vacations:

Step one is to decide where to travel for vacation.  Beach, mountains, amusement park, family, etc.  If you have options, it can take time to discuss the ideal destination for this vacation.

Step two is to decide when you are going.  Everyone grabs their calendar for a review.  If you aren’t all together, there is going to be some back and forth to decide.  This step takes some time, but eventually, all are on the same page regarding the dates for the vacation.

Step three is deciding on the accommodations.  The options are seemingly endless with VRBO and many hotels (depending on your destination).  There is...

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Unconditional

Unconditional means “not subject to any conditions”.  Do you unconditionally love your spouse?  Do you unconditionally love your children?  Do you truly want to experience happiness and joy?  If you are being honest with yourself, the answer is no.  Our level of satisfaction or dissatisfaction with our lives and relationships is directly tied to conditions.  If you disagree, do this exercise right now.  Create a list of relationships and scenarios in which you DO NOT base your satisfaction on an expectation.  We expect our spouse to act in a certain way and become disappointed or frustrated when they don’t act according to our expectations.  We expect our boss to treat us a certain way but they don’t so we become unsatisfied with the relationship.  We go out to dinner expecting a specific experience but the service or food is inconsistent with our expectations, leaving us frustrated and disappointed.

The...

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Time vs. Money

What is time?  Turns out there are multiple answers to this questions and the topic can get quite philosophical.  For purposes of this article, let's consider time to be the connection between the past, present, and future - specifically relevant to us and Earth.  I know…my brain almost hurts considering even this lame conceptual reference.  For us, time is finite.  We will not get more of it.  We can potentially affect our longevity with healthy choices, however the law of averages will eventually have its way with us.  This is not to say that we should not do everything possible to be healthy, but realistic about our actual “choice” in the matter.

 

So time is finite and it consists of events and moments.  In general we might agree that a “good life” means we used our time wisely and in ways that improved something.  The something could be our financial position, societal position, our community, our...

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Your True Potential

Ask yourself right now “Am I living to my TRUE potential?”  True potential is obtainable and sustainable for all who use these three ingredients – time, effort, and discipline.

 

Several years ago, a good friend of mine became disgusted with his physical health.  One day he decided he was not living his true potential in this area of his life and began to set time aside in his calendar for exercise.  He made an effort to run and each day made it a little further before stopping.  He changed his diet, choosing the salad versus the cheeseburger (discipline).  He signed up for a 5K, 10K, half marathon, and has now completed several full marathons.  Here is a situation in which he grew his capacity and potential through time, effort, and discipline.

 

Time – We all have the same amount of time.  There are 86,400 seconds in a day.  The question is how are we investing this most precious commodity we call...

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Asleep at the Wheel

Of course, I am an awesome parent.  I get up, work hard every day, and tell them I love them.  Surely, they realize I do all of this for them.  Why would I work as hard as I do if it wasn’t for them?

 

Humans are masterful storytellers.  We can make ourselves believe and validate nearly any rational or irrational behavior.  As parents, we make excuses for providing real leadership for our children.  Let’s dispel a few of those excuses now and clear the way for leadership in our families.

 

 

I go to work every day for hours on end to provide a life for my family.

Food, shelter, cars, vacations, phones, insurance, Netflix, etc.  This is an excuse for validating endless work that our society has happily allowed us to employ.  I know many people that spend endless hours at work because it is easier than parenting or leading a family.  Work becomes a convenient excuse for avoiding the significantly greater...

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Manifest Anything

Last week, we talked about fixed versus growth mindset.  Adopting and living in a growth mindset is the first step to manifesting anything you want in your life.  If you are skeptical of this claim, you just might still be in a fixed mindset.  Here are five steps that will help you manifest anything in life:

 

 

Choose a growth mindset.  If you want to manifest anything in your life, you will need to choose growth mode over fixed mode.  It is just that straight forward.  If you are in fixed mode, it won’t be easy to break free.  You have likely had years of programming.  Here are a few ideas to help you begin to shift your mode:

 

Personal Narrative – You are going to need to take control of that voice inside your head.  This is the voice that seeks validation at every turn.  This is what recalls failures, transgressions, and broken dreams from our past.  This personal narrative chooses to use the past...

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Mindset

I recently read a book by Carol Dweck called Mindset.  In this book, Professor Dweck describes that there are only two types of mindset: fixed and growth.  Studies in human behavior have also determined that these are the two types of mindsets within humanity.  Each is described below, but first, let's define mindset – mindsets are beliefs about yourself and your most fundamental qualities such as intelligence, talents, and personality.  Let’s explore the two types:

 

 

The Fixed Mindset – This is the person that believes their intelligence or talents are fixed traits.  They focus on measuring their intelligence or talent instead of cultivating and developing each.  They believe that talent alone will determine their success.  This belief couldn't be further from reality.  Fixed mindset are the glass half-empty, “it is what it is” type of people.  They are the killjoys of the world.  Limited...

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